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Posts archive for: March, 2007
  • it

    i was sat alone one sunny afternoon. the complete lack of wind kept everything around me so still, i even felt just a little paralized. as my mind started to drift some place far from my physical being, something insided of me made its way to the surface. it then started to seep out of me. the sensation was so overwhelming it left me speechless and a little empty. i was mind dumb but free.

    it!
    i needed it,
    but i felt it going down my knees so grand, so freely.
    i saw it, and released it, out my eyes so kneenly.
    Hear it, pouring past my lips, it drips,
    slowly out my feet.
    It's streaming

    so...
    Now i don't feel complete,
    somehow i won't be unique,
    it's gone
    it's in you
    from me

    So do you need it?
    Come feel it, seeping out so black, so bleakly.
    Come see it, release
    and free it
    pouring out the kitchen sink, secretly.
    See it
    it's coming outmy feet
    it's streaming
    thick ink

    And...
    Now i don't feel complete,
    somwhow now i wont be unique
    my sleeps gone,
    the dreams are in you
    from me.

    I saw it it leave,
    I sat alone
    all alone,
    did i cry? could i breathe
    all alone
    i was waiting to be consoled!
    full blown,
    i screamed into the morning dew,
    i saw it weeping too.

    Now i can't feel unique
    somehow now i don't feel complete
    now that it's gone
    it's done
    will you feel unique?

  • Realizing my Dying Dream-poetry lesson

    so this is my second entry and am feeling good. Been job hunting, well looking through the classified and ooohing and aaaring at all the great jobs i don't qualify for. its a bit frustrating, but what part of life isn't these days. I watch alot of reality T.V,m you know really interesting stuff like The Hill and Wife Swap and lets not forget everyones fav...Britny and K.Feds K.OTIK, what a shocking display that was. so yeah i think i know a bit about frustration, never mind the fact that it's not mine and some of it might be a bit of an egsager, but i think its a reflection of life, a true one? maybe not so much, but a reflection of some sort nontheless! yeah, am a bit of a couch potatoe! a habit am easing out of.

    Realizing my dying dream, just a little tto late,
    deep in sleep, while my reality keeps the boundaries od decite
    around a hole punched soul, a tear stained goal,
    with nowhere to go but home.
    Pencile or pen, paper on her lap,
    clap, calp moving to his beat,
    not my own,
    along his crumpled sheet.
    All the while a smile, cheek to cheek with the perfect frown
    matured like wine and nurtured by a time of bearable, managable grief.

    Hair covered eyes behind the black carpet.
    Lonley long and longed for, caressing her till old.
    Never cold, but shivering for too long,
    from her hurt, moulding her till old.

    Realizing my dream a little too early,
    a little too girly i her reach
    and fragile meek speach...
    Not sure and desperate for a sneek peek
    found only on her pillow as they sleep.

    Longing to travel, see, touch and to breathe
    Behind eyelids red to the light
    Waiting she is, but patiently putting life on hold
    What's important now can never be to her future
    so placed on her bare shelf to be pulled out,
    maybe later.

    That is a little something i wrote a while back while i wa still at University. Insteady of studying HARD and ready endlessly irritating and mind numbing cases and articles, i was writing poems about how my life is over! I wasn't much of a law student, think that's probably why i passed with a second class second division, that's like a 60 percent agarigate...if only i had applied myself!!!!
    no regrets though, i got a lot of "work done".

    So now am looking for any kind of work anywhere in the world as long as it's not toilet scrubbing or anything that goes contrary to my mothers morels!! P.A to Linda Perry would be a great start, or to a publishing comp. or any thing in musik...yes i am desperate and trying hussl, as best i can! think i'll try alot harder later, right now am destessing, thats why i love to blog. it's not too out of my element cause its like talking to myself, which is something i do on a regular basis, i just have so much going on in my head.
    i think its about time i hooked up some pictures or something, i don't want my millions of readers getting bored...can someone please read THIS!!! it's been like three days and still nothing, am getting a little discouraged... really.
    till next i write
    watch this space

  • searching?

    how hard is life? really!!? i've been at it for nearly 24 years and i still don't have a grip on it. i know where i want to go but i don't quite know how to get there. i know exactly who i want to be, but am not sure if am her yet, and what it takes to be that person. Coming from a tiny land locked country..yes the only country that is completely landlocked by one country...Lesotho for all those who didn't know....it is really hard to get out there. With the internet being our only real escape, it's hard to go through those experiances that help to discover who you are and where you want to go. ok so i might know,and have had some eye openers under my belt but ther are no tools to show me HOW to get there, and that's where am at now. i have no idea HOW.
    I just finished University last year september and am now the proud holder of a degree in law and i'm not sure i want to be a LAWYER! imagine that!! i don't feel like i wasted those years in school cause at least i'll have a degree to fall back on, and those years in school actually got my creative juices going. i hated school so much that with all the venting i was able to re read what i wrote and i discovered i wasn't too shabby...i was actually quite GOOD. i am just worried now that i'll waste the next 5 years completely clueless on where to go next, and what to do. i love to write, espercially poems and what i like to think are really good lyrics to songs without a tune..yet, but i don't know what to do with them. i guess that's wwwwhy i figured setting up a blog would help me release some of what's inside me and will not only inspire me to move forward with my writting, but to find some one out there who can not only help me out with it, but to just... i don't know, read what i have to say and give me some constructive crits..not too harsh mind, am still young and easily wounded. so Linda Perry (former 4 non Blonds)if your reading this holla back.. I L.O.V.E your work!
    till next i write
    so all you creative souls out there, watch this space, a whole lot should be going on in it

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